If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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