Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
