yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
