How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
