So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Randomize
