his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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