Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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