apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize