Your mouth is God's brothel.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
