My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
