They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize