i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
