No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
