He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
this will be a night to untag.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
