She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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