hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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