i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Even my vagina gasped.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
