so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
