It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Randomize
