Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
