Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Randomize
