Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
