he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
