She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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