Your mouth is God's brothel.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Sext me about skeletons
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
