if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Im part way to drunk.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
