is your mom at the bar?
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
