I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
