I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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