Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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