Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
