And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
