So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
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