If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
