heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize