Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize