yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
