Umm I'm too high to move.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
