I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
