I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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