Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
