My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize