talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I think my vagina is haunted
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize