I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
