i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
