I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
