so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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