Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize