If i come over, it means nothing
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
