You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
