Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Randomize
